He held my left hand in his and was tracing the lines on my palm with his fingers. He started drawing thick lines first and then the thinner lines. When his fingers started tracing the lines on my wrist, I felt a little awkward. I moved my hand from his hands to grab the beer bottle next to me. I think he understood that I wasn’t comfortable with he tracing those lines anymore. We were sitting on the wall guarding the beach. The soothing sounds of the waves were adding to the serene moment we were living. The evening sky was playing our favorite game of colours. We were talking about good and bad dreams we saw in sleep. I could see a gleam of happiness in his eyes when he was talking about the dream of the successful startup he always wished to start. He was so lost in the dream that he stopped drawing on my palm. He instead wrapped his hands around my palm. It was my turn to talk about a dream. He was so lost in his parallel world that he didn’t realize that I haven’t spoken a word since long. I didn’t bring him to reality to remind him that it was all just a dream. I liked this feeling. He holding my hand tight, and we sitting on the wall, watching the waves come and go, just like dreams, come and go. I had a feeling that he wasn’t telling everything he saw. Maybe he didn’t want to, so I didn’t ask what about the dream he wasn’t telling. We sat there for long. The moon’s reflection on the water was getting bigger. The last beer bottle was empty now. I removed my hand from his hands, held his face to kiss him. I couldn’t. I kissed his forehead instead and started walking on the rim of the wall. I didn’t look back because I didn’t want to have a sad memory of him. He stopped me holding my hand and said, “don’t want to know the part of the dream I didn’t say?” of course I wanted to know. But, it was late already. He doesn’t hold the same place in my life anymore. And I didn’t want to give him that place again. He knew, if he’d said the full story, I would stay back. And I knew, if I’d stay back, I would be repeating the same mistake again. So I just release my hand from his hold and tell, “all the best for your dream” and leave.
Pic Courtesy: Instagram account, @vysh_t
‘I love you’ she said. Of course I wanted to tell her how much I loved her. I wanted to tell her that I loved her too. But, she was drunk. She wouldn’t remember a word I would tell her now. I wanted to hug her, hold her tight in my arms make her feel safe and warm. But, she was drunk. She wouldn’t remember the feeling. I wanted to kiss her and remind her how special she is, for me. But, she was drunk. She wouldn’t remember our first kiss. I carried her to her bed to put her to sleep and pulled the blanket on the rim of her bed over her. She hugged her doll on the other end of the bed and held my hand tight and was talking words only I could understand. I have heard her talk in sleep, in drunk state, in insane phase, in vulnerable phase. She was repeating ‘I love you. I want to spend all my life with you’. She held my hand tighter and didn’t let me go. I sat next to her on her bed, waiting for her to fall asleep. She kept talking some silly funny things and started laughing in drunk state. She fell asleep with the fading laughter. She looked even more beautiful in sleep. I could watch her sleep all night. Even in sleep she didn’t leave my hand. I somehow removed my hand from her hold without waking her. Then adjusted the blanket properly so that she wouldn’t feel cold at night and lose sleep. Then went to the kitchen to bring a glass of water and a dispirin and kept them on the table next to her bed with a note “just in case you have a headache”. Her hangover after beer is very bad. She would need it. Kissing her on her forehead I left the room, waiting for her to wake up, with a hope that she remembers what she said tonight.
In the morning after I was done with my morning chores I called her on the landline to check whether she was awake or not. She never receives a call on mobile phone when she is asleep. Her fresh-morning-filled-with-little-sleep voice made my morning. She thanked for the dispirin.
She loved mornings more than nights. Not because her fantasy of him drawing her name by the stars lying on the lawn with her head resting on his chest hasn’t remained a fantasy anymore. Not because the dark empty spaces were filled with many moments of good memories. Not because she had someone by her side who would hug her and make her feel safe when she woke up in the middle of night after a nightmare. Because their mornings starts with seeing the dawn. Walking by the river, watching the birds fly out to start their day. Watching the newspaper-walahs spreading stories of yesterday. Watching the empty buses starting their ride. Watching the laughter clubs spreading laughter, people learning to laugh away their pains. Everyone starting a new day with a new hope and with the aim that today will be better than yesterday without worrying about tomorrow.
His smile always reached his eyes whenever he saw her blush. And his this smile, made her blush harder. This smile of his didn’t fade even when she fell asleep for ever. Even her dead face blushed.
She always wondered what was that in him that gave her strength? What was that about him which encouraged her to live? What was that faith in him that made her trust in herself? She had many such questions. His smile, his hug, his love, his everything answered them all. One of the few answers which were answered without the use of words.
She held her tears back for long. The moment he pulled her in his arms, tears started flowing. It was like she was talking through tears. Though he couldn’t understand the reason behind them, he could feel her standing strong in his arms. This made him feel strong. Now that she is strong enough he is going to listen the whole story.
Picture source : Google
She had stripped her soul naked in front of him. He could see each and every scar. With every scar he touched, they healed. Just like a magic. But, that big scar, his touch could never heal. He wanted that scar to just die and disappear with its memories. All he could do is remind her every day his actions, the reason behind the scar.
Pic source : Google
One day, they met when the handsome sun and beautiful moon met. Just as the heavenly bodies departed their ways, they too departed. Unlike the sun and the moon, they were meeting for the last time. One had busy day and the other sleepless night.
Pic source : Google